On my way to class doe. You braggin bout my last hoe. #Bars #Spittin #Damn #ImNotARapper ……I ain’t mean to freestyle on ya’ll like that.
BUT YO…..I know you niggas are all wrapped up in the current cuffing season craze, and I’m just here to let ya’ll know that it’s still real out here. Females cheat everyday of the week. Sometimes twice on Tuesdays. Ya’ll gotta sleep with your eyes open, and make sure the TV volume is low enough so you can hear every single vibration that comes from her Android. Here we go……
Locked Phone
Oh her phone has a lock on it? For what? Does my phone have a passcode? Hell yeah, and its perfectly fine. That’s not even a double standard though. That’s just protecting what’s yours. The point is, if she has a lock on her phone, 10 times out of 10 she’s receiving all sorts of thirst midday and is tryna keep em’ securely stored away in her EVO. Females are the best cheaters. That’s just fact. The vaginal species ACTUALLY invented cheating. Ask my nigga Jeeves.
Frequent Bathroom Trips
Now, this one you can just play by ear. I wouldn’t just jump the gun and say she’s cheating because she has to piss a lot. But if she takes her phone with her everytime……..SHE’S CHEATING. No question. You have to know that she’s firing off several sneak texts in between that toilet flush and running faucet water. These hoes sneaky out here fam. They have us beat by a long shot.
1000+ Followers
First of all, shame on you if your girlfriend has 1000+ followers, and you’re still on the struggle stuck at 267. These chicks out here get followers with ease fam, and with followers, comes what? THIRST. Now, I don’t care how much thirst a female complains about on the daily, because deep down in her heart filled with cheat codes SHE ENJOYS THE ATTENTION. Thirst always leads to late night DM’s, a sudden increase of retweets, and numbers being exchanged.
2K Victory
YO. If you lose a legit game of 2K on any skill level to your girlfriend, just take whatever system you have back to GameStop for store credit. Not only should your pride be crushed, but you should also be aware that she’s playing numerous exhibition games with another nigga every saturday afternoon. Just tragic.
New Sex Moves
If you came home from a long day of work, and she hits you with some brand new exclusive, unreleased Detox shit….SHE’S CHEATING. The nigga she be coolin’ with while you’re slaving by the hour just left your home less than 20 minutes ago. Now, I’m not promoting domestic violence or anything, but if your “girl” has enough courage to bring ANOTHER nigga in the house, that’s perfect reason to thump her dead in the forehead multiple times as hard as you can. If you wanna throw a body slam or two in there, go for it.
Protected Tweets
We all hate protected tweets. We all do. But its just unacceptable for a girl in a relationship to have steel armored tweets. If she decides to block you after an argument, its curtains. That leaves the door wide open for slithering thirst to creep in her mentions and you’ll never know. You can’t see what she posts, so she could EASILY be flirting via subtweets, and doing other whore like activities she couldn’t do before. My advice…….Make your girlfriend unprotect her tweets fam. Thank me later.
R1, R2, L1, R2, Left, Down, Right, Up, Left, Down, Right, Up…….Yeah ya’ll know what it is.
I’m out tho. Keep chillin how ya’ll be chillin, and tell all the big booty white girls you know I said “What Up?”
Oh yeah………………….Niggas that never beat GTA: Vice City opinions will never EVER matter. #FACT
